Now I'm turning them gay

AFL is back as of last night. Collingwood unfortunately got smashed by North Melbourne in the opening round of the NAB Cup. The tragic part for me is that I encouraged both my classes to watch the black and white on television. As a Collingwood supporter you know a thing or two about losing so I'll walk into class on Monday, my head held high and just ask if they enjoyed the game. It's one of those rare moments that I hope the English level of my students is not at a high standard. That way at least, they're unlikely to heckle my team's performance. W, the Bombers got done as well, so at least I'm in good company.

Life can be very hard for some people. As much as I try, even I can only understand and empathise with a small percentage of the world's problems. This afternoon one of my sisters lamented that she would probably be stuck in her current house for many many years.

Sister : I think we're going to be stuck in that house forever.
Me : Really? Why?
Sister : Well, once you buy a million dollar house there's just nowhere inbetween a 1 million and 2 million dollar property.
Me - jaw dropping, not even remotely sure there's anything I can say to this.
Sister : Oh and we just don't have the money for a two million dollar property.

I really feel for my sister. Such dilemmas must make life rather difficult indeed. I felt that it was especially classy of her to say this to her teacher brother who will probably never actually be able to afford to own any kind of property on a single teacher's wage.

Another one bites the dust. Usually I drive my ex-girlfriends to marriage. So far 3 of the 5 major relationships I've been in have resulted in the girl getting married within a year of us parting ways. At one point I was thinking about setting up my own business for marriage-minded women. Come here! Date me for a couple of months and then within 12 months you'll be married. All this or your money back! I'm not sure if this speaks well of my boyfriending ability or not. Are they so crushed after having been with me that they throw themselves at the next guy that comes along, knowing they'll never have it so good ever again? I'm pretty sure that's the way my ego is spinning this odd sequence of events. You guys be the judge.

In this instance the circumstances are slightly different. I was contacted by an ex recently who wanted my advice... hmmm... that's not exactly right. It's more like she just wanted to tell me - God knows why - that she was now dating a woman. I'm pretty sure that having dated me she realises that there's no point in being with any other man so she has switched sides completely. And before I hear your 'Buts' and 'Just a minute theres' we should all agree that it's far better for my fragile self-image that this is the only possible reason for her now dating a woman. The alternative way of thinking is just too depressing.

I think the only reason this is even a blip on the radar is because I'm just upset she didn't discover this side of herself when we were together. Yes, despite what you read I can be very much a guy.